Does #smashthepatriarchy mean Matriarchy?
Replacing paternal structures with maternal ones is not the only choice.
I’m currently traveling in the US, where I haven’t been for two years due to the pandemic. The last time I was here, Donald Trump was still President; Breonna Taylor and George Floyd were still alive; Bill Cosby was still in prison for aggravated indecent assault, and Harvey Weinstein was not. There was no pandemic, no threat of the world shutting down or catching fire or not looking any different than it always had. That was Summer 2019.
So much has changed since then, and visiting now feels different, especially in the wake of #metoo and #blacklivesmatter, although most pointedly in the current of the ongoing pandemic. And climate change is undeniably upon us, and undeniably an emergency. The future remains unwritten.
The friends I’m visiting have been bringing me up to speed on deeper cultural changes in their worlds: work is different, corporate life is no longer the same. Values have also changed, and quality of life is a higher priority than location, location, location was before. But the friends I’m visiting are also very privileged: they have incomes in the higher end of the scale. And they’re men.
Our conversations have drifted across many topics, but the one that got most heated was their take on hearing people say “smash the patriarchy”. They feel that the system does not need to be completely dismantled and the cries of protestors and progressives over the past few years are overlooking or, worse, dismissing any good that has been done, any benefits that have been achieved within this system. Their POVs are very US-centric, so when someone’s talking about smashing the patriarchy, what they’re hearing is “destroy the United States”.
What they’re not able to see is the systemic differences for people based on gender and race. The more overt examples are obvious even to them, e.g., the gross divide between rich and poor, the pay gap, the racism as class divide. But they also see examples of progress and achievement, citing having women as bosses, working for Black people, or the great strides in equality and equal opportunity that have been made over our own lifetimes. And they are not able to see any other kind of…